Remaining Calm

Does anyone else have trouble remaining calm when you run face-to-face into something unexpected and inconvenient?

I try to remain calm and think and backtrack and all that.

I really do.

But when I run out of ideas and I’m still in the same unexpected predicament, I go to Plan B. Usually this means I’m calling, texting, IM-ing my husband for his help.

I don’t like going to Plan B because I’m:

  • independent (I prefer to do things myself most of the time)
  • usually on top of things (typically I’m aware of everything going on in my environment)
  • perhaps a bit proud (what if I lost it or made a mistake or…see what I mean?)
  • hesitant to bother him at work (I recognize that he is busy and I honestly don’t want to disturb him and add to his plate)

When I start to lose it is when Plan B doesn’t work…when Mr. Beck isn’t answering his calls or texts or instant messages…when I can’t reach him on his office phone because he’s not in the directory yet and the recording keeps taking me back to the same message over and over and over…when I’ve called him 20 times and no response.

After the first 3-4 calls, I start to think something is really wrong. Was he in an accident on the way to work? Is something going on at his office and that’s why the receptionist (I’m 100% sure I saw a receptionist at the front desk that time we visited him at work) isn’t answering the phone?

So, at this point there is anger and fear involved. There is no more calm. No more thinking clearly. The appointment has come and gone – had to reschedule.

Am I the only one that does this?

I guess at this point I should be more specific about what happened to spark this post. My two little ones and I get monthly adjustments and we had our appointments this morning. Most offices, this one included, charge some kind of fee if there’s a late cancellation or no-show, which makes sense because they could have scheduled that time for someone else. On top of that my back has been killing me lately – I was totally looking forward to this adjustment.

So, I finally had the babies dressed and ready to go and on our way out the door…no keys. They weren’t in their usual spot. We only have the one key, so it isn’t like I could just grab the spare and go.

Y’all…I looked everywhere. Everywhere I thought they could be. (That’s important.)

At first, it was no big deal. I had started to get ready early because I needed to stop by the bank on the way, so I had a little smidgen of breathing room.

Then everything fell apart because trying to take care of it myself hadn’t worked…contacting my husband (who had the keys last) hadn’t worked…my Little Man was confused because he knows our routine and it had gone awry, so he was following me around whining/crying…it was not pleasant, people.

I had gone into full out “panic and ugly crying” mode.

Mr. Beck finally answered his phone and had no idea where the keys were hiding.

Grrrr.

So, let’s fast forward to the part where the littles were put to bed for their naps and I had a chance to search more thoroughly the same spots I searched before we missed the appointment. Still nothing..and the prideful me sighed a sigh of relief that I wasn’t wrong. The keys were definitely really lost.

The idea that they might have been dropped outside between the garage and home crossed my mind. I hadn’t seen them when we walked out to look, so I called the office and asked if someone had turned in some keys. “No, but we’ll call you if we find them.”

Great, so our van could be gone and I had no way to open the garage and check.

Then, after fiddling around with other things for a few minutes, I started thinking about what happened when we got home last night. I mentally rehashed walking in the door…what we said…what we did…

At that point, I went into the kids’ bathroom and there they were on the counter. Sitting there and laughing at me.

Grrrr.

All the panic and ugly crying flashed across my mind in a vivid mental picture and I cringed.

I felt overdramatic (which I can’t stand) and pretty stupid for not thinking to look there sooner.

Then there’s resolve not to ever get that bent out of shape again…as if I haven’t already told myself this before. As if this is the first time it’s ever happened and I won’t do it again. Yeah, right.

Is it just me that has trouble remaining calm in circumstances like this?

Is it?!

I hope not. Though I wouldn’t wish that kind of frustration and stress on anyone, I hope I’m not alone. If I am, I think that would be the worst ever.

 

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